And a New Beginning for Me

Where to begin...another post I've written in my head for nine months. I always figured I would somehow go back to work once all my girls were in school.  I just never knew those 10 years at home would go in the blink of an eye.

As the time came closer for school starting, Brandon and I started talking about what I would be doing. My immediate thought was to sub and only sub at their school. However, that required me taking a three hour online class to renew my subbing certificate. Ugh. I can't begin to tell you how much I did NOT want to do that. (But at the end of those eight weeks, I felt so good about accomplishing something.)

When the principal found out all this, he called and offered me a full time kindergarten para position.  I prayed about it but knew this wasn't a good fit for me, so I told him I would be more interested in a part time para position. And then I told him about a good friend for the kdg para job. :) 

A few weeks later he called again - this time with a part time as a sped para. And my heart beat a little faster. Brandon and I prayed about it, and when I met with him, I shared my heart that I would like to sub, too.

He was fully on board. I felt like I had landed an unbelievable job. I was at my girls' school everyday from 8:45-12:45. Once my class was completed, then I subbed occasionally, too. My day consisted of spending time with my "sped" kids helping them keep up in class. I was in 4th grade writing, kdg, reading with my 1st grader and kindergartner, some time in 2nd grade, and then I wrapped up my day with 5th graders in math. I loved the variety; I loved seeing teachers teach; I loved being a part of something in a school; I never had recess or lunch duty. I LOVED seeing my girls throughout the day. I felt spoiled.

I won't lie and say everything was perfect; there were days I wish I had 7 hours to myself at home. At the beginning of the year I grieved a bit; I just wanted two weeks at home to get all sorts of projects accomplished without interruptions. I missed going to my lady's Bible study that I had been apart of for several years. 

I struggled with being a "working" mom and not feeling guilty about it. But I will never forget a couple of things Brandon said that have stuck with him. I got my W2 for taxes and saw what little I had made my first few months of working. I just had to laugh, but Brandon told me, "Be thankful you are getting paid; you'd be doing the same thing for free if you weren't working there."

And at the end of the year as  I reevaluated my time as a working mom and wondering if my mothering had suffered at all, he seemed surprised I had those thoughts. He told me there was no doubt I was where God wanted me to be.

I loved loving "my" kids. I knew many had hurts in their life, so if I could love them at school and help them, then that's why I was there.  I also wanted to help and encourage teachers along the way. This was my mission field.

So did some days get long? Yes. Did I miss time to myself at home? Yes (my two hours each day almost seemed non-existent). Did Satan plant doubts in my head? Yes. But was I where I feel like God called me to be during this season of life? Absolutely. 

And for now I am enjoying my summer knowing that next fall will be a new challenge as I take on a maternity sub job.

First day of school I made myself a "P" for Pam the Para.

It's a Wrap in 4th

Just like that I was the mom of a 4th grader. I knew this was going to be a big "jump" from 3rd to 4th grade, and the teachers put a lot of emphasis on that. Thankfully I knew Analise would handle the transition well.

She, too, was excited about her teacher this year; she was more excited her good friend, Ally, got the same teacher.

Nothing like a chocolate chip pancake to kick off 4th grade.

Analise did have a great year. She is such a first born and wants to do things right. Therefore, she follows rules and gets things turned in one time. We are also blessed that things come pretty easily for her, so she didn't have much homework. She enjoyed her classmates, switching with other teachers, and she loved Mrs. Carnahan. Mrs. Carnahan is caring and witty, which Analise enjoyed. 

The beginning of the year was a little rough, and it took some time to figure out why. Analise had to take an antibiotic for something (I don't even remember) and that set her up for tummy troubles. She would wake up each morning and have tummy issues. To the point where she couldn't go to school. And then by 9:30 she was just fine. She'd eat and have no issues. We had testing done, we saw the chiropractor and prayed. We talked about worry and how that can effect physical things.

Finally, after talking with a friend who is a PA, she mentioned taking some over the counter medicine to help her stomach lining heal from the antibiotic usage.  (I think it was Zantac) A few days later, she was a new girl.

The cycle was broken. Praise the Lord! 

Analise was able to be a ball girl for the high school volleyball game this fall, so that was a lot of fun for both of us.  This winter she had club volleyball and always kept up with her piano.

Analise with Mrs. Carnahan

At the last assembly, Analise received the character award for her class, and she also got the reading award for having read the most points of all 4th graders. It was fun to see her surprised face when they called her name.

 Also at the end of the year, Analise did a first - she participated in the talent show. Analise does not like being in front of people,  so this was a big deal. I hate to say I talked her into it, but I pushed her on her reasoning for originally saying, "no." She had great friends that were going to perform a routine to Toby Mac's "Me Without You." I told her this was an opportunity to be with good Christian friends and shining her light for Jesus. She committed to it and was so glad she did.

Analise, we are always so proud with how well you are doing at school. But it's more than that; we love your love of learning. And your middle name of Joy is so evident in your life. We always pray that you do things for God's glory, not for man's. He gives you gifts; your gift back to Him is how you use those gifts.

Keep smiling, keep trying and keep loving others along the way.

And yes, I am still in shock next year is your last year in elementary school.

It's a Wrap for 1st Grade

Maisie was excited for school to start, and she was happy about the teacher she had been given. We didn't know anything about her, but for some reason Maisie had wanted to have her.

Here she is on the first morning...ready to eat her #1 pancake!

 I am very thankful Maisie had a great year, too. Her learning accelerated this year, and she ended up being one of the top readers in her class. She was responsible at school, had a like/dislike relationship with math, and she was always smiling at school. 

And the bond with her teacher was simply incredible. My girls have all loved their teachers, but sometimes God just gives you just a bit more - and that's what Maisie and Ms. Vacek had this year.

Two peas in a pod. Maisie thought Ms. Vacek was simply the best thing ever. And Ms. Vacek loved Maisie and her sense of humor. Maisie would write spelling sentences to make Ms. Vacek laugh; they would write sweet notes to each other in her planner. Maisie liked staying after school to help Ms. Vacek clean up the room. (Why isn't she like that at home? :))

My heart still overflows for their relationship. I also enjoyed having her become a friend. I pray that I can be a positive, Godly influence in her life, since I don't know where she is spiritually.

Something else special this year was that when Ms. Vacek had to miss school, I was able to sub! That was so fun being in Maisie's class.  I was Mrs. Luke and mom all in one. :)

At the last assembly, Maisie got the character award for her class. 

And here she is on the last day. She was so excited to be finished with school and yet sad at the same time to leave Ms. Vacek.

 In addition to school this year, Maisie added to her extra curricular activities. She had CMA on Monday nights, Awana and Weds, and she added gymnastics on Tuesday nights. She loved this! She and her great friend were in the same class. That was a perk for me, too, since we could carpool. :) 

Music isn't her love and so it was fun to see her gain some confidence and explore something new she did enjoy and did well with.

Maisie we are so proud of how far you have come this year. You learned so much and applied yourself to new things. I love hearing how well you are reading, and even better, I love how you are comprehending what you are reading for your AR quizzes! Speaking of that, I am so excited how you made Mr. Stute's AR goal every quarter; that was a lot of reading!

Most of all, I loved how your joy from Jesus overflowed and affected so many around you at school. I pray you continue to smile and laugh due to joy in your life. Don't let frustrations get you down; let them make you stronger. We love you Miss Maisie!

It's a Wrap for Kdg

 So I have had this post in my head for months. Since August, actually.

My baby was in kindergarten this last year, and I really struggled with that. Brandon had no idea how hard it was for me until the night before school started. I just lost it...cried and cried. I cried at the end of an era; I cried about new beginnings. And I kept asking myself, "Did I do enough? Was I a good enough mom for all these years we were at home together?" Truly, I asked myself that question over and over. And then a still, small voice from the Lord said, "Pam...they have all asked Jesus into their hearts. Is there anything more important than that?" I finally felt peace from then on.

So here is Sadie on the first day of school with her pancake in a "k" for kindergarten. We were both a bit anxious that day.

And of course it had to be pouring the first morning of school. 

I remember dropping them all off at school. We crammed under one big umbrella and I walked Sadie inside. And then one lonely mom walked out by herself. And I went home to an empty house - for just a bit, but more on that later.

Sadie had a great year at school. She made new friends, gained confidence and learned so much academically. I love hearing her read these days. She enjoyed her teacher, Mrs. Fusby. And honestly, Mrs. Fusby enjoyed Sadie. She couldn't believe how well Sadie was doing since she was a preemie. Again, we praised God for how well she is.

At the last school assembly, Sadie got the "Author of the Month" for her class. She was excited!

And here she is on the last day of school.

Sadie, we are so proud of you and how well you have done this last year. You had a rough bit of time about two weeks into school when the newness wore off, but you rose to the challenge and survived. In fact, you thrived. I loved seeing your smiley face throughout the school  year, and I loved how you gave me a hug when I picked you up each day. I love seeing you excited when your friends did something well, and I appreciated your responsibility to get things to school when they needed to be. 

And now, well, I am excited to spend my summer with you. I love you Sadie Lady!