A Hard Road Traveled

I want to thank everyone for their kind, encouraging words and prayers. They mean a lot to me!

Last Monday I took Sadie in for another appointment. This time we were finally able to see our pediatrician. I asked her for her advice on traveling with Sadie. She gave me her blessing, so that was a step in the right direction.
We were then supposed to go see the pulmonologist two hours away, but I called ahead to let him know Sadie was sick. We rescheduled, and I think that was a blessing in disguise.
This gave me a day at home to do laundry and begin the packing process. There was no questioning of whether or not I would go back home for the funeral. It was a matter of deciding how and who all went. And really, once we looked at the costs of flights, that wasn't even an option.
We had willing families to take in the older girls so Brandon, Sadie and I could have a "simple" trip. I went back and forth on what to do. I was sad Analise had to miss pre-school, her last night of Awana and her cousin's birthday party. Yet at the same time I knew she would love seeing her grandparents. With Brandon's encouragement, we decided to make this a family trip.
I packed up Tuesday morning, and we hit the road mid afternoon. We made it 5 hours and stopped for the night. When we travel, I try and keep a schedule as much as possible. We all slept pretty good, and the girls loved their morning swim. Back on the road for another 9 hours. It's a long trip, but the girls do amazingly well. They play some, color, and I love my ipod with kid's music. We are also very thankful for the DVD player. :)
We drove right through the city where my sister lives, so she met us for a bathroom/gas break. Though only 15 minutes, it was a treat seeing her. I don't think either of us will ever forget watching Maisie run full force into a phone booth and falling over backwards. Poor girl...needs to run while looking forward. :)
We got to my parent's house for a late, yummy supper. I got Sadie ready for bed when my friend, K, stopped by to pick me up for coffee. K, Rachel and I have been going for coffee for years. Even when I was away for college and then moved away after married, whenever I was home, we always met for coffee. I knew this time was going to be hard, but I also wanted that time with K. Time to cry, reflect and honor Rachel. We went somewhere that I hadn't been before with Rachel, and that helped some, but when we sat down we realized though the table was for two, there were three chairs. I still cry just thinking about it.
Thursday the whole family went to Kohls. It's so much easier shopping when adults outnumber the kids. :)
That afternoon I went to the viewing. I went at 3:00 and had to wait an hour and 20 minutes to see the family. I was able to visit with people I hadn't seen in years. I also got to talk with Rachel's mom and husband. It was hard seeing Rachel there in body but not in soul and spirit. My friend, K, had done Rachel's makeup and it looked great!
Thursday evening we crashed at home; I was exhausted. However, I stayed up to watch the Dove Awards. I love Christian music and never get to see the awards, so this was a treat for me. I picked 6-7 winners. :) I saw Chris Tomlin sing his newly played song that I love - I Will Rise. All week when I heard that song on the radio, I thought of Rachel and her family. The thought of reuniting with Christ and loved ones is encouraging, esp. at a time like this.
Friday morning I went to burial with K and her husband. It was a time for family and close friends. The weather was warm but windy. The pastor did a great job sharing. He talked about the graveside as a place to remember, release and rest. Each of the three children let go of heart shaped balloons that said, "I love you." After shedding yet more tears, we went to the church for a meal. It was a nice time to visit with others and share memories of our dear Rachel.
Friday evening was the celebration service. Brandon went with me since we had some great, free babysitting. :) We were dressed up and even took a two door car...a night out the two of us...to my dear friend's service. The service was hard, and I went through many kleenex, but it was also beautiful and spirit filled. We sang some of Rachel's favorite worship songs, her dad, brothers and husband all did an amazing job of sharing. The Pastor again did a great job and shared about hope. We know we have hope in seeing Rachel again. Praise God! He used verses in his sermon that Rachel had highlighted in her Bible and even told us some of the notes she had written in there. What a treasure it was to "hear" from Rachel again and also know it's something the kids can learn from their mother.
The final song was "I Will Rise" - how appropriate. We were all sitting and singing along (if one can sing and cry at the same time) when towards the end of the song when it builds, S, stood up with his arms reaching towards his Father in Heaven. It was a gripping image that I hope I never forget. We look forward to the coming day when all the saints shall be together forever. It may seem like a long time now, but we know the time is just a mist in the light of eternity.
I knew Rachel for 12 years. We met after I graduated from high school. I met her at K the same summer/fall. We all worked at the same place. I don't remember the exact details; it just seems like those two were always a part of my life. We shopped, ate out, went for coffee and always had long talks. We were all in each other's weddings, celebrated the births of all our children and could always share where we were struggling. There was always a realness with Rachel. She loved God, served Him passionately, loved her husband unconditionally and adored her three gifts - her children. Though we didn't talk on the phone all the time, we emailed, had FB and whenever we connected, it was like time had never passed. I miss that dear friend. I know I am not the only one; she touched many lives. I am just thankful that I can grieve in hope. Rachel - I miss you and love you.

Many Thoughts

I feel so behind in my posting, but one of these days I will be caught up! I have wanted to do a girl update so I don't forget their changes and growing, but that will have to wait for another time.

This past week was a tough week. A week I never thought would happen, and I felt like I was living out a dream or character in a book. Unfortunately it was all too real.

Last Saturday began as a good day. Brandon was out turkey hunting, and I got the clothing switched over for the big girls. They played so well together while I worked. I got out the inflatable hippo and filled it with balls, so all the girls loved it. And I loved the feeling of getting things cleaned and organized.
That evening we got together with rest of the family for a dinner together while we waited for the hunters to come home. By the time they arrived I noticed Sadie wasn't acting quite right. Her cough sounded different, she was breathing rapidly, she was retracting, and her pulse was fast. I've learned enough in the last year to know these are not good signs...esp. for Sadie with her small lungs. My dear sis in law, who happens to have a nursing degree, agreed that I should call the doctor. 30 minutes later we were headed to the ER. Welcome home, hunting husband! My dear mom in law came home with us to put the girls to bed and stay with them. We got to the ER around 9:00 and didn't leave until after midnight! She had to give blood, take an x-ray, have her nose swabbed, all while it was way past her bedtime. She was such a trooper. She fussed only a little and slept in her daddy's arms. Thankfully her oxygen levels were good. Sadie was diagnosed with viral pnemonia, but she was able to get an antibiotic shot and sent home with an order to give her breathing treatments. We were all weary when we got home.
When we got home, my mom in law told me I was to call my friend, K, back home no matter the time. She knew it was about our mutual friend, Rachel. I knew something wasn't right if I was calling K at that hour. Never would I have guessed what she was about to tell me...
Brandon had gone to bed, and I was giving Sadie an extra bottle when I called K. She had to break the news to me that Rachel had gone into the ER with difficulty breathing and no heartbeat, and she didn't make it. I couldn't believe what I had heard. My dear friend of 12 years, only 31 years old, was walking on streets of gold. Her baby was only a week old! Today was her 6 year old's birthday! How could this be? Why????
Needless to say I didn't get much sleep that night. Wretched grief...
I went to church the next morning with the older girls knowing it would be hard but also knowing I needed to be with the family of God worshiping together. I had dear friends pray with me, cry with me and offer to help in any way imaginable. Sisters in Christ living like God intends.
This tragic news put our upcoming week into a slight tailspin. Dealing with the loss, grieving for S and the kids and trying to make plans that would include a child with pnemonia. God went before us and we were able to make the best plans we could...those of which will come in the following post. I close with asking for prayer for Rachel's family. Her husband, S, and three kids: A (6) B (4) and C (now 2 weeks.) (Those really are the kid's initials...cute, isn't it?)

Easter Celebrations

I love the joy of Easter season...celebrating our Risen Saviour! It's overwhelming when I think about Christ dying for me, and yet He conquered the grave! Praise God! I always enjoy this time of year to go over the Resurrection Eggs with Analise. She always does such a nice job of explaining what is inside each egg, and I pray the story also resounds in her heart. This year she would tell me that the soldiers "rambled" for Jesus' clothing.
We had fun having Grandmom and Pops here for the Easter holiday. Saturday morning was nice enough to go to the park for the park and rec egg hunt. The girls were in two different groups, so Analise went with my mom, and I walked with Maisie. Pops got to watch us while taking care of Sadie. They were pleased with the candy and eggs they found. Here are my hunters:
They were excited to see the Easter Bunny

Later in the day we colored eggs. This is one of my favorite traditions each year. I love the cozy, exciting, creative atmosphere of coloring the eggs and seeing what they look like when they come out of the dye. Now I live that excitement through my girls because I didn't color a single egg. Next year we will have to have more eggs. Again, it was nice having extra hands to help!

Here are my crazy bunnies!

Easter morning was cold and windy. Nothing like nice dresses and winter coats. :) The first thing Analise told me when she got up was, "Happy Easter Mom!" They never asked to look for their baskets or eggs. We just got ready for church. All three girls were with us during the service, and I enjoyed that. It was a sweet time of worship.

We all had lunch together with the other family in town. Talk about yummy! After the Easter lunch, we switched gears to birthday mode for one of the cousins.


All ready for church:

By the time we got home later afternoon, the girls were past nap/rest time. Analise played her new Wii game, Wii Music. Maisie fell asleep in her daddy's lap. (See below)We finally sent the girls looking for their baskets, and I think they were pleased. Analise got a new life jacket and fishing pole. Maisie got a new pole, Color Wonder books and a toothbrush. Sadie got a new toothbrush and toothpaste...exciting. :) It was a fun filled day!

Easter Photos

These pictures were taken by a friend, and they are all in their Easter dresses. I am not a frilly dress kind of mama, so I went more with a polkadot theme. She had little chickies that the girls loved, and they surived Maisie's handling.

Thursday/Friday Fun

Analise enjoyed the giraffes, but she would tell you she liked the elephants the best.

Sadie took a 20 minute cat nap, and my arm was SO tired when she woke up.

The gorilla was up close and personal, but Analise backed up quickly when he started to move.

My three girlies....hee hee

The petting farm was Maisie's favorite...move and touch - her learning style. :)

We had a great weekend. I am going to spread the memories out in more than one post. My parents flew into a city about three hours away. Since we never get to hang out there while they are here, we went and met them there. On Thursday, we loaded up the girls after lunch and headed east. We met up at a GREAT Hampton and began the fun. The girls and I went with mom to a big outfitter store. The guys went to get Brandon fitted for a new golf driver. I'll admit, it was kind of strange being at this store without Brandon. Even Analise mentioned that. We walked in the store and a nice employee gave the older two several coins to use in the shooting gallery, and he told Analise to make sure she shot the skunk. So here I am trying to teach my girls how to hold a gun; something is wrong with this picture! Brandon would have loved being in on this activity. Analise is shooting the gun, and I kept getting water in my face. I was looking all over wondering why I was the only one getting wet. Turned out that when she shot the skunk, the skunk's tail lifted and sprayed water!

We met back up with the men and headed to the best food/games/rides place I have ever been. It's like a Dave and Buster's for kids. (No, it was NOT Chucky Cheese! :)) We enjoyed a nice meal, and the girls had lots of tokens to use. Maisie did the small rides, Analise rode a big ride with Grandmom, we played Skee Ball (my fave!) and drove go karts. Brandon took Analise, and Maisie was adament she go too, so we went together. We could not have done this if my parents hadn't been there to stay with Sadie.

After that fun, we crammed in some swimming for the girls. Analise is getting more brave in the water, but she has a long way to go. I'm afraid she is more like me....not a natural! But she had fun, and that's all the counts. Maisie has no fear in the water. Unlike Analise at that age, who was like a life jacket on Brandon, Maisie just wants to be free. They got to bed late and were tuckered out.

The next morning we were so thankful to see the sun, because we headed to the zoo. This is an awesome zoo, and I couldn't wait for my parents and the girls to enjoy it. It was a little crisp, but we did the indoor buildings to start. We were able to see lots of animals up close, and we even heard a tiger growl. Being the monkey lover, I enjoyed the Ape house. Maisie's favorite was the barn area. She loved petting the goats and tried feeding them rocks. Analise was brave enough to go in the pen when she saw her sister in there. Maisie even charged after peacocks! :)

The girls did awesome...never complained, and that's with pushing through one or two naps. It was so nice on my part to have the adults outnumber the kids. SO much easier!

We got home close to bedtime, but we just had to squeeze in a little Wii time with Grandmom and Pops. Analise had been looking forward to that for weeks. And again, the girls got to bed late, but it was worth it!

Picture Update Part 2

The girls put on their suits...Analise helped Maisie. Can you tell?

Crazy hair...post pony tail

Maisie loves these balloons and took them to the bathroom with her. :)

Maisie isn't scared of much. This bug skin fascinated her. Gross :)

Picture Update Part 1

HI! I just have time today for picture updates. However, it looks like I will be doing it in two posts. It won't let me upload more than five pictures at a time, and they never upload in the order I put them. Oh well....Analise loves the swing, and I love she can pump herself! Sadie's first time in the swing...she giggled and giggled

Maisie ate lunch with her hat and glasses on...look closely; she is covered in yogurt

I am assuming some made it into her tummy...

The big one year old lovin' the swing!